The Asian Fail

It is conceivable that the idea of the asian fail was born from an asian fail. Some unfortunate, illiterate asian parent somehow mistranslated the chart of grades such that instead of:

85-100: High Distinction

75-84: Distinction

65-74: Credit

50-64: Pass

0-49: Fail

It looked more like this:

85-100: 很 好 (very good)

75-84: 好 (good)

65-74: 剛好合格? 不可能接受 (just passed? Unacceptable)

50-64: 你說什麼？再說一遍 (what did you say? Say it again...)

0-49: 你知不知道我花了多少錢對你的教育嗎?! 你這樣對待我? 我很失望! 你的頭有問題嗎? *%&^%* 你不是我的兒子!

(do you know how much money I've spent on your education? And you do this to me? I'm very disappointed. Is there something wrong with your head? [Profanities] You are not my son!)

... And as is so often the case, the misinformed asian parent imparted his or her 'knowledge' of grades to other asian parents, and thus the asian fail was born.

Those who are not inclined to accept the 'asian fail' as a true 'fail' in literal terms, have difficulty understanding why it is the case that some asians treat a 'pass' or a 'credit', with such hostility. Here's some personal insight.

My idea of a fail is not so much an exaggerated grades chart, but an indication that I have not achieved what I am capable of achieving. I don't give a fucking rats ass if I performed relatively well. I am self-centred. It's all about me. (What do you expect from a wanker).

"But why take it so personal? Who gives a shit about grades? It's such a superfluous thing."

I take it personal. I give a shit. I give many a shit. Every 'fail' is a slap in the face with cow turd. Consider this: every person would like to think they possess an exceptional quality. We hate to think (though it is often the reality...) that we are yet another human in a cluster of humans; another ant in the colony. Our qualities define our identity. Me; I wasn't born with great physical abilities. Nor was I born with great musical talent. No dashing good looks, no sense of being sociable. What I did get from my genes however, was a slightly oversized head, which I always took to mean that perhaps I had a brain slightly larger than normal. Win. I pride myself on being 'smart'; I work hard to be 'smart', so you bet I take grades personal. It's extra salt in the wound when you discover that someone has succeeded where you have faltered, with so little effort. It's like a white guy running a 100m sprint, pushing so hard that he's about to pee his pants, but in the corner of his eye, he sees some black guy breeze past him with nonchalant strides and a sparkle in his smile (ding).

All of what's been said would have you believe that I'm just some vain little bastard who whines about nerdy shit all day in front of his computer. True. I am a vain little bastard who whines about nerdy shit all day in front of his computer. But cut me some slack. It's all I can whine about.